Dear Chemo...#4

THURSDAY, AUGUST 4, 2011 9:14 PM, EDT

Dear Chemo #4...

Logan, Parker and I were driving home from school yesterday with a trunk full of dinners and breakfasts, compliments of teachers and parents at Kayfield Academy, when Logan began talking about Bambi. I LOVE that he loves Bambi for many reasons: 

• Bambi was my favorite Disney flick growing up. I had a counted cross stitch Bambi blanket that might as well have hung out of my mouth like Logan's "danket." I loved that blanket, and I wish that I had it to hand down to one of my children. I can still picture every little detail of the threads that I used to rub my fingers over as I fell asleep.
• Nathan is a hunter. You know how the best marriage advice ever is to choose your battles? I had to fight tooth and nail to not have dead things hanging in my house. It started with a restriction to the "study" in our first house. It was the only place I would allow the dead things because it was the only room in the house that could not be seen from the kitchen, the dining room, or a bedroom. My platform was the logic of not wanting to have animal spirits staring over me while preparing a meal, eating said meal, or trying to whisk myself off into a peaceful slumber. It was a hard bargain, but I drove it home. When we moved to Reno, the rules had been established. The 2 mounted bucks, the antelope, the beaver skull, and the 2 turkey feathers/beards were exiled again to the "study." There is no "study" in our current home in Louisville. Needless to say, the animals are in the man-cave, aka the outdoor storage shed. I mention this because Lo is an animal lover, and I would be shocked if he ends up pointing a gun at Bambi's mother someday.
• I could watch that movie time and time and time again. Thumper is just the cutest little bunny I ever did see, and he has one smart Mama.

So as Logan and I discussed the idea of watching Bambi on a school afternoon, which is a rare treat in our house, two spotted fawns were feeding on the side of the road. It was so sweet that I turned around so that Logan could see them. He was elated! It was perfect timing, and so relevant.

When we arrived at home, Logan ran straight to the front door. He immediately ran to the television, pulled Bambi out of the DVD case, and placed it in the Playstation. It still amazes me how technically savvy my two year old is. He sat on the couch and watched the movie as I recited every line from the kitchen. 

I cooked dinner - a taco casserole from one of the parents in Logan's class. It was wonderful, and one of 8 meals that Kayfield sent home with us yesterday, in addition to several gift cards for restaurants and a spa! It was so nice to think that I wouldn't have to think about cooking over the next few days.  The peace of mind that it gave me knowing that the people who are taking care of my children are so incredibly thoughtful is unfathomable. To the parents (who we only know through our childrens' classroom interactions) who contributed to this gift, I cannot thank you enough. My only hope is that your anonymity is short-lived, and that we can thank you in person very soon. And to JR and Staci, parents of "Pey-Pey" (Logan's best buddy in school), you are AMAZING! Thank you for organizing this touching display of friendship!

You'll notice that I didn't have a letter to Chemo this week. That's because Thumper's Mama always told him that if hecouldn't say anything nice, don't say nothin' at all...and I've got nothing nice to say to Chemo this week. I had my follow up MRI on Tuesday, and I acquired the report today. The report reads "...consistent with no response to neoadjuvant chemotherapy." So there we have it. A long, miserable two months with no results. So onto the next Chemo, beginning next week. Here's hoping for drastically different results in the next round...and another long 2 months.